Admittedly, it’s been a bit quite lately on SexGodProject.com. To be honest, I kind of got stuck. At the beginning I knew that it is not only a physical journey but also an emotional and later a mental as well as a philosophical/spiritual one. But I was hoping that it’s mostly a physical one and one that just needs some lifestyle changes such as giving up on porn and establishing an exercise habit but apparently it’s not. Don’t get me wrong. Giving up on porn and physical fitness are the corner stones but they are just that.
Last week I was pointed to an article on Spiegel.de that tells the story of a 21 year old student from Germany who suffers from erectile dysfunction just like me. Apparently the topic slowly starts to gain traction even within the mainstream media which isn’t a surprise because as the article points out there is an estimated 50.000 men and boys under 30 that suffer from ED in Germany alone. That’s one in 100 guys under the age of 30.
The article further explores the fact that it’s not (really) a physical problem but (mostly) a mental one that a lot of guys try to battle on the physical layer with pills which in the long run simply isn’t the proper way to address the problem.
The last couple of weeks where I was a bit quite on here, I spent time untangling the different layers. They all fuel the problem and are connected but have to be addressed separately to successfully overcome the problem.
I started to indulge myself into Jungian psychology where I stumbled upon a mythological map of the mature masculine psyche that beautifully portrays the underlying dynamic of the whole problem. I got to understand that the different aspects of the male psyche with its positive as well as negative manifestations (also called shadow aspects) and being able to locate oneself within the map does not only help to overcome the problem of psychologically induced erectile dysfunction but will even result in achieving a balanced mature masculine identity. Which is pretty neat I think.
But wait a minute. Did I just say psychologically induced erectile dysfunction? Wasn’t it porn induced erectile dysfunction to begin with as described in Porn is the Enemy of Great Sex? That’s right but (compulsively) watching and masturbating to porn is yet only another symptom of a much deeper issue. Just cutting of porn does not get rid of the underlaying psychological issue. So getting rid of porn helps to heal on one level (the dopamin issue) but neglects the much bigger unconscious level that I’ll explain in more detail in a separate blog post.
When I was reading about the different archetypal aspects of the masculine psyche I was showered with endorphins because it all started to make sense. The dots started to connect. Without going too much into detail at this point, I got to know that my dominant masculine archetype is the Warrior. And I remember that at one point I was criticized on Facebook that I approach the Sex God Project like I am going to war. Well, as it turns out I am but not in the way that I was criticized for.
I am not approaching sex like going to war but dealing with the problem. What I unconsciously was doing for the first half of the year was to prepare for the battle against the actual issue. The physical layer sets the context for the emotional layer and at it’s core it’s an emotional issue I have to deal with. This seems to be true for most guys suffering from this form of ED as I got to know through yet another source that I’ll share with you later.
Let me use Joseph Campbells distilled mythological structure to express where I am right now. At the end of 2012 I had a Call to Adventure that I followed by trespassing the First Threshold through creating this very site and faced my first Enemies in the form of habits and temptations. I am now on my way to enter the Cave facing the Dragon, defeating it to then conquer the Elixir of Life, which can be symbolically read as sexual potency.
Since I know that going into the psyche is something to take seriously, I started to work with a psychotherapist who is specialized in sexuality to guide and mentor me along the way. In the diary section of the Sex God Project I will share with you my personal and subjective thoughts and experiences I make along the way.
It all lead up to this point and different circumstances in my life conspired so that I am right where I am. At the entrance of the cave. And although I feel anxious, I know that there is no other way than onwards. So I foster my strongest Warrior aspects and courageously enter the cave.