According to a 2016 study, 80% of men age 18-30 view porn at least once a month and 40% daily. Most people believe that watching porn is a way to feel good and more of a solution to sexual frustration, boredom, stress, anxiety, and loneliness rather than a problem. So, why should you quit porn?

Urologist Harry Fisch, MD, writes in his book The New Naked: “A man who masturbates frequently can soon develop erection problems when he is with his partner. Add porn to the mix, and he can become unable to have sex.” The belief that watching porn is harmless or even beneficial is simply outdated. Fifty studies alone link regular porn use to lower sexual and relationship satisfaction.

So, let’s have a closer look at five specific benefits of quitting porn:

1. Reverse Porn-Induced Sexual Dysfunctions

Have you ever experienced premature ejaculation, erectile dysfunction, or delayed orgasm with a partner, although everything worked fine when fapping to porn? You are not alone. Every third guy under the age of 30 has erectile dysfunction now. That’s an increase of 1000% compared to previous generations, and everything points to hardcore internet porn as the main cause.

The problem appears to be twofold. On the one hand, internet porn hijacks your brain’s reward system. Evolutionary speaking, we are primed for novelty. Internet porn offers more novelty than having sex with a real-life partner ever can. Very soon, real-life pales in comparison. One partner simply isn’t as exciting for the brain as a rapid change of different virtual partners and scenarios. This ultimately leads to shorter and weaker arousal with erectile-dysfunction as one of its symptoms.

“Every third guy under the age of 30 has erectile dysfunction now.”

On the other hand, establishing a masturbation routine conditions your brain to a particular way to stay aroused and reach orgasm. In the NoFab community, there is a phenomenon called the death grip, which describes the need to apply a lot of pressure on your dick when masturbating to reach orgasm. The same can be true for a specific rhythm. Oral and penetrative sex simply don’t provide the necessary pressure and rhythm needed. This then can delay or even inhibit orgasm.

Erectile dysfunction is the number one reason why people want to stop watching porn. I suffered from porn-induced erectile dysfunction and delayed orgasm for years. This was also why I started the Sex God Project in the first place, as described in How to Become a Sex God. The good news is that all these porn-induced sexual dysfunctions are reversible by quitting porn and rewiring your brain with specific sexual healing exercises.

2. Normalize Sexual Desires and Fantasies

Have you ever felt ashamed or disgusted right after watching porn? This might have been the case after watching depictions of degradation and abuse, extreme fetishes or material that doesn’t correspond with your sexual orientation. This behavior is called escalation and is usually a clear sign of addiction. 

Like with any other addiction, your brain can get desensitized over time. What was exciting and arousing at first becomes quickly dull. So, you need a bigger hit to get the same high. This has become both an individual as well as a societal problem. Compare a porn movie from the ’80s with a regular video on any tube site today, and you will notice the difference quickly. Internet porn has normalized violence and abuse, pushing for ever more extreme scenarios. 

“Internet porn has normalized violence and abuse.”

What’s more, anxiety and arousal are physiologically speaking closely related. This means anxiety-producing material can pump up the excitement even more. Both novelty and anxiety now increase arousal. It’s important to know that our brains aren’t fixed but constantly adapt to our environment through a process called neuroplasticity. This means we gradually overwrite our natural arousal templates with the ever more extreme images we fap and orgasm to.

I escalated many times with material that didn’t reflect who I am and made me feel ashamed. This behavior pushed me ever deeper into what I now know is porn addiction. But, this too is reversible. Stop watching porn will, over time, normalize your arousal templates back to healthy desires and fantasies.

3. Rewire Attraction to Real People

Have you ever preferred watching porn over actually having sex? Young men become increasingly more indifferent or even averse to sex. The number has increased to 31% for men aged 18-24 in the last years. A 2017 study suggests that higher levels of porn use correlate with preferring porn over real people. 

“Any partner, scenario, or fetish you desire is instantly consumable with the tap of a finger on a device in your pocket.”

This makes kind of sense, especially if you are not in a relationship. First, you have to find a suitable partner who is also interested in you. Then, you have to negotiate what you want and what you are willing to do, most likely having to settle on some compromise. Porn, on the other hand, is much more readily accessible and always delivers what it promises. Any partner, scenario, or fetish you desire is instantly consumable with the tap of a finger on a device in your pocket. But at what cost?

I chose porn countless times over the opportunity for actual sex. In the end, this behavior rendered me sexually anorexic. Quitting porn was essential in normalizing my desire for real people. And let’s be honest, having sex with real people can feel so much more exciting and rewarding than fapping to the most exotic and extreme porn ever can.

4. Rediscover Intimacy

Are you having sex dates that leave you emotionally empty, or has the sex life in your relationship taken a nosedive? Different studies demonstrate that abnormally large stimulation interferes with pair-bonding and increases the importance of sex without emotional involvement. Porn might corrupt your relationship or might be a crucial factor why you are single.

Porn teaches us two things very well. Firstly, it teaches us to be voyeurs. When we watch porn, we are never part of the sexual experience. We are always on the sideline watching. Vision is the predominant sense in porn, whereas the dominant sense for real-life sexual experience is touch. In porn, the focus is always on the genitals and rarely on the hands or eyes. What’s more, porn reduces sex to a predictable script that is more performance than a playful and sensual encounter.

“Porn teaches us to objectify people.”

Secondly, porn teaches us to objectify people. People become objects that we can use (and abuse) to satisfy our own needs. This is the opposite of intimacy. Intimacy means seeing the other person for who she or he really is and having the courage to let yourself be seen for who you are. This can be scary as fuck because it makes rejection painful. Porn, on the other hand, is emotionally speaking, safe and gives us the illusion of intimacy while leaving us emotionally starving.

I have objectified people in my life, and I substituted my genuine need for intimacy with porn creating and feeding my addiction for years in the process. Intimacy doesn’t come easy to some people. But, it’s a skill that can and must be (re-)learned if we want rich and meaningful sexual experiences and relationships.

5. Get Superpowers (in a Way)

There are guys in the NoFab community that talk about getting superpowers if you quit porn. I was always a bit put off by these claims. I believe that quitting porn won’t give you superpowers but look at it this way: If you got slowly but progressively short-sighted for years, being able to see clearly again might feel like having superpowers after all.

“Science slowly starts to uncover more benefits of quitting porn.”

Science slowly starts to uncover more benefits of quitting porn. This includes enhancing your brain functions that might have been compromised by watching porn, such as your willpower to delay gratifications and your ability to focus. It may also improve your overall mental health, significantly decreasing social anxiety and depression. Additionally, you will gain more time and energy, which might allow you to (re-)discover and accelerate at your passions and purpose in life.

All of this can boost your confidence, which in return might make you more attractive to other people. I certainly could observe sometimes smaller and sometimes more significant improvements in all of these aspects of my life.

Bonus: Stop Supporting Sexual Abuse

As sex educator Ran Gavrieli says in his TEDx Talk Why I Stopped Watching Porn: Nobodies’ childhood dream is to become a prostitute and let’s be honest, porn is prostitution. The topic of sex work is a difficult one and certainly needs to be addressed in all its complexity, but there is no denying that the porn industry is inseparably tied to the exploitation of victims of trauma and economic hardship.

“75% of porn actors use alcohol and illegal substances to cope with the mental and physical pain.”

The statistics paint a clear picture. 75% of porn actors use alcohol and illegal substances to cope with the mental and physical pain. The average life expectancy of a porn performer is only 36.2 years. Add human trafficking on top of that, and you have a contemporary manifestation of slavery. Make sure to watch Greg’s interview to get a personal take on that aspect.

Someone might argue that they are only watching free porn on one of the countless tube sites. Sorry bro, but I have bad news for you. You don’t even have to pay for porn to still be part of a corrupt and abusive system. The French journalist Ovidi explains this in her eye-opening documentary “Pornocracy: The New Sex Multinationals”.

Are You Ready to Quit Porn?

First and foremost, quitting porn has the potential to increase the quality of your sex life. And although its quality and not quantity we should aim for, it could also mean that you will have more sex overall. It’s funny that those who defend internet porn call those who argue against it prudish when, in fact, quitting porn is one of the most sex-positive things you can do.

If you now feel inspired to quit porn, make sure to check out The Ultimate Guide on How to Stop Watching Porn. If you want to learn more about porn addiction first, check out Gary Wilsons book Your Brain On Porn.

Are you excited? You should be! This could be the beginning of your personal journey to a richer sex life and more meaningful intimate relationships.

Make sure to let me know your thoughts on and experiences with porn in your life in the comments below.